I am in some strange mood tonight….well its positive strange …from that mood comes this picture
Dont listen…its Rammstein !!!:D
Yesterday one of my picture was chose for Second life Pic of The day \o/.I am proud and honored and ofc i dont know to shut up so..i must say that i prefer landscape pictures and pics with some story rather than close up but on other side I am happy coz I am in love in my new look*winks*..do you belive that pic at first i didnt want to put on Flickr coz i didnt like it :Dbut if Second life say that is great …i belive them:) Thank you SL 🙂 (now i sound like ungrateful bitch ..but I am just honest)
So…some girls ask me about this look :
Horns: [VN] Celestial Horns-@ C88
Skin:Glam Affair – Cleo
Eyes:IKON Ardent Eyes
(diadem not come with horns..its part of some my old ugly outfit;D)
Btw this outfit was for picture -Dance with me ♥
Strawberry Singh meme for this week…well its meme from her friend..and from his post all can see how amazing friend he is …before I make a mess with explaining things…read here Berrywinters meme.
Its kinda private meme but i dont mind..and no ..with my story i dont want that ppl be sorry or look at me like a victim..no I am not…I am normal (sometimes),happy person..with some shits in life…but all ppl have problems and for everyone their own problems are bigest…but there is always a hope…shity phrase but tru….I wana say that… sometimes you fall down and touch bottom but you must find hope,faith.love ,strenght …get up and move…coz there are many falls in life…and I know that end of love(relationship) can hurt..and somethimes that looks like end of the world…but time will heal everything(another shity phrase I know)and good friends.
Ok i wrote a book…now my story…I am not sure about what part of my life to write..I will try to be short.
When I was 17 years old my mother died from cancer on my hands…she had 47 years…now i have 37 and i think about her every day of my life..I miss her…so I stay at home to take care of my father who had schizophrenia..I didnt have computer then and internet…I dont want to make this story too long and I will said that in that 2 years of my life I touch bottom of life ..I am not person who cry ..I make shits when I feel bad.wrong.men..wrong relatshionships….in that black time of my life….my best friend help me to get up..well her mother find me a job(and I still work there)..i still remember her words:“If you have kid …do you want that she/he have life like yours in case that something happens to you ?“I get up and move..start to work ..have some relationships ….love some man..some loved me…I was hurt…and bla bla…but I think that i am little hendicapped in „love stuff“…its funny and strange that Second life learn me to show my emotions.
Then after 3 years relatshionship I get merry and I got beautiful daughter..well that marriage was wrong but my daughter is my straingh now.My father died before 5 years but I survive…you look everything with different eyes when you have reason to live.
Next chapter in my life…before 1,5 years i got cancer…surgery…chemotherapy…radiotherapy..and i am still here…I cry just that day when doctors told me that I have cancer..I go out…sit on stairs ….and call my best friend (that friend from childhood)…and after 30 min I was ready to fight…and to win…and I survive…and what If cancer comes back…yes sometimes I think about that….who cares I will eat him again🙂
My strenght,my hope,my love and my reason to live is my daughter.I dont have many things in my life…but i have enough…I have her..I have my best friend….maybe I dont have Rl love…but that will happen one day…hope dies last 😛
Now when i read what I wrote..maybe is too much..SL is not place to share private things…but on other way..maybe this story will help someone..to see that…when you think that everything is black…and when you dont see the way out..remember that always can be worst..find your strenght in friends…family…get up and move on….tommorow is another day (Ok ..on the end of post i become Scarlett O*Hara …Eeeeek..time to log in in SL for some shoping therapy)
Btw..for this post i will use one picture which i use before on some other post…coz I think that is perfect for this story!
Have a great evening!
Long time ago i write about daydreaming…imagination…and safe place in your head when you can hide from reality..this morning i read that post (if you wana reading link is HERE)..and i think….well I usually dont think early in the morning…but that happens sometimes:P…I did some things and I am sorry on one way..it was hard to make that decision…but on another way…I lost my safe place…where i can be whatever I want…and do whatever I want..I mix some other life with reality and it was great time…but I lost myself somewhere…maybe I am selfish…but I just need to fly away…on some other time and place where everything is possible..where everything is fun ..where I am a queen..where I can dance naked on the rain..nah too much philosophy for this morning..I just..dont want to mix my fantasy and imagination with RL…coz then..they stop to be fantasy and magic is gone.. and i will lost myself again.
Am I dreamer….idiot….fucked up..or i have some brain disease:D I have no idea but I feel good right now in my own skin and that is important(well skin is not mine its from Glam Affair:P)
Enough philosophy for one day…time for shoping..This cute set of poses is ofc from Uncertain smile.. Fly Way set is made for The Surreal Complex event
Have a great day !
Good Morning…one more week…but its start with a smile :D(big smile with big shiny white teeth)..even some rumors wasnt distroy my good mood-i hate online rumors..I dont belive anyone except myself…just saying…ok next subject.
L ast night i had fun in SL after some time…i was on some fashion show i have no idea where but I know with whom ….so that is enough 😛 I love fashion and i saw great outfits…models is to skini for my taste but I notice that they work hard…after 4 years this is my first serious fashion show..and last coz it was lagy like hell and after 20 min I was boring:D(sorry for my bad english this morning…I slept only 4 hours)…anyway this is not subject of this post…but I just wana say….its nice to be judge on fashion show…sit..drink…and give points…3,4….4,5…:P
Its my pleasure to intorduce to you Uncertain smile …store for poses with props by Isabelli Anatine.First is hair and shoes love and then love for poses(for me) so from today i will write often and use most of her poses coz I like all of them 🙂 LA FETE TRISTE SET or something like..a dead in a cage is tree with wearable props and 3 animation..set is made for The Surreal Complex event but it will be in main store after event .Her event theme is Dream and you shoud check it coz she have one more nice pose set there also(I will show you on next post)
I know that this pose set is kinda death style but I alwas see things with different eyes and I am not good friend with death so…you can use it for dark pictures but i see it like this
Ofc…I must show my Ps skills 😀
I take picture of just 2 animation but in set is one more,,I didnt have time to fix my wedding dress in Ps in last picture:P(am I boring with Ps?Yes I am but I dont care:D)
Have a good week and visit Uncertain smile
Good evening!Its 1am and nope I am not in bed jet:)…reason for this late post is..I visit one magical place tonight…but lets start from begining..those days I am busy…I spent all of my free time in Ps..that helps me to dont think…Its good thing when you dont think …my day was…well…so so..working on some pictures…and then I realized that I didnt change my outfit for 3 days!!!..Just change for shots and then back again in same outfit!!!So I decide to go in little shoping…but I saw one picture on flickr and I decide to visit that place …and then…WOW…THAT AWESOME MOMENT WHEN YOU ARE FUCKIN HAPPY AND YOU DONT KNOW WHY!:D
“You are the creator of your own destiny”
Gates of destiny-wonderful,magical and beautiful place!!Everyone who knows me..knows that my style is colorful places so I am shocked …but this place impressed me…I was there few hours and take milion pictures of beautiful sculpures..trees..etc..I will show you some of them here…I edit this one ..well…i couldnt resist…but just little…moon..birds…water splash..
What I didnt know is that this great place is home of Shelly70 Resident but its open for public…and she did great job…I must say thanks to her coz she made my day(evening)
Ofc I forget go to shoping..but nvm…I will do that tomorrow
I am not “awwwwww”person..but next picture make me smile:)
This was Gates of Destiny seen through my eyes and your taxi is HERE
One quick post for today.When I was in my “privacy mood” i visited some old places to see what is new.Two my favorite places are Small town of green and Annwn Willows…ok I spend much time at Bubblez also coz there is rezz permision and I like to take photos there…its nice..I bloged before about all this places.and I love it in every season..so here is some new shots of Small town and Annwn and one old from Bubblez.
Enjoy your day!
Kiss the rain
Whenever you need me
Kiss the rain
Whenever I’m gone, too long.
If your lips
Feel lonely and thirsty
Kiss the rain
And wait for the dawn.
Keep in mind
We’re under the same sky
And the nights
As empty for me, as for you
If ya feel
You can’t wait till morinin’
Kiss the rain
Picture inspired by beautiful Billie Myers song-Kiss T he Rain
And good morning..its 9 AM!!!Well this is month when WE go to school in the morning so my day begin at 6 AM every f day!!I was in bed last night at 9 PM and I still dont know where am I…and now when you know when I wake up and when I go to bed 😛 ..I wana share some thing…Its maybe small step for humanity but its big for me 😛
I did my first serious photo in Photoshop YEY!I did some pictures before but always someone help me and when i close PS i always forget what I did..I played before with blur and crop …and also with Online Photo Editor-here is link to one good …its easy and you can make amazing things with him-BeFunky..anyway..every time when I dont know what to do with my free time(and I still didnt start to work …and outside is f cold…and kid is in school)I find some new things to do…to learn….this time that is PS…I learn how to remove things from picture…clean it…and add some water and rain effect(with brushes and filters)…I know that for someone this is small thing but for me….happy happy joy joy!!:DI dont want to explain how I did it…coz you can find everything on youtube ..and if I start …that will last till next morning…I spent 4 hours(now I can do that for hm..maybe 15 min…ofc i wrote what I did:P) on this pic but on the end I am satisfied:DOfc pose and WL is still important for good pic…and inspiration for sure…and my next pic will be….well I will show you 🙂
With this post I wana say…If I can ….everyone can ….well you can everything only if you want..Its like that …in all things in life:)
Have a great day and enjoy in this great song:)
„And then something change you.You realize that you can not be that man from yesterday.but you dont know who will you bee tommorow.You dont know excatly whats waiting for you but you suspect that in front of you are not good days.Then you tell yourself that they are better then days before,and that new tomorrow will enlighten you and you will see things with new eyes….“
These nights i sleep very badly..I dont know is that coz I am on diet and hungry!!…and wake up every morning with big „whole“ in my stomach( this morning i wana kill for one big fat BUREK..I cant explain what is that on English but look picture HERE nomnomnom)….or maybe it coz my conscience..just some things dont let me go…I dreamed about big black birds…cold nights…deep black wather..and bla bla …classic nightmare..and no I dont want to analyze what that mean but to be honest I think this morning little about it…about some things I did…some words which I said…and I miss that time when i belive that bogeymen live just under my bed(today bogyman looks different and they are not only under my bed )…but on the end i figured….thats me….i never regret for choices I made…and things I ve done..and mistakes i made…they all are mine..and I know what is good for me…and I can learn from my mistakes….and I know one thing….tonight before bed I will eat something…or my next morning will be shity…who knows maybe i will dream about green fields…butterflyes and colorful flowers
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